Sunday 22 August 2010

wedding: the process of removing weeds from ones garden

I've not really blogged about it thus far, save few practical updates, but it is 5 days away and the time has really come to do so. Ask me when I'm getting married? For a long time it was 'once I graduate' or 'the summer after next'. After christmas etcetera it became 'this year!' and '27th august'. Recently it became months, then weeks. I know I was supposed to have the rapid fire answer of "ONLY x days" on whatever occasion but I never did, I just knew it was coming, I knew it would come with autumn.
Last Sunday Stuart and I went to Kelvingrove park for the last day of summer. It was warm and humid and you could have been in a swimsuit but I had called the change in the season a week or so prior. One morning I woke up and the sun had become white. I opened the window to air the bedroom and there was a sharpness to breathe, something of freezings coming for far away. A few days ago it was windy and the washing line flapped violently. For the first time since April pegs fell from the peg holder. I ritually cleared the summer garden, took in the last carrots and potatoes and pandered to the parsnips and leeks. Thoughts turned to bulbs. Last night I was waiting for the washing machine to finish lest it burn my kitties alive and I looked out the window. At 10pm it was deeply dark, the ground was wet and the rain should have been gentle but the gusts splattered it abusively. It was autumn already and not just a touch, it is now coming thick and fast.
We are going to Bath for our honeymoon and then onto London. I expect that autumn hasn't quite the grip in the south of England yet that it has here, so we will be in the roof top spa and hopefully the last of summer we will bask in for a day.
So the wedding has come. All I have heard from friends, family, gift-givers, well-wishers and gossipers alike has been just how fast it will come in. It will come in in no time. It'll be the wedding and you won't know where the time has gone. To be sure I do know where the time has gone; it has gone into my degree and the painstaking planning and arranging of every detail of this DIY wedding. It has become like a living thing, constantly needing care and attention so it survives. Friday is its coming out party and then it will be fully grown.
I've done a lot for it. My printer is tired of bleeding ink in monotype corsiva, my hands are tired of glueing, my brain is swarming with guests and my sofa bed it fed up with being a holding bay for boxes of ivory coloured items.
I think it will rain on my wedding day. It feels like it is coming to it. Of late it has been humid or gusty or mildy drizzly; something has to give. It will probably be on Friday - and I have an umbrella.
I'm picking up my dress tomorrow, the dress that I knew was mine as soon as I stepped into it. It's demure you know. I'm looking forward to wearing it though I feel a bit of a fraud in it. I suppose that is normal. I'm just bobben you know.
I've been feeling sick for four days now. I feel nautious when I drink (anything, tea), I feel dizzy when I sit and weak when I stand, my head has been aching on and off. I've been running a lot and I havn't for a few days, I don't want to risk getting ill before the wedding. I've not been eating enough vegetables; I haven't had much money for a while so we have been living off of fish cakes, potato latkes (kosher for passover) and ikea meatballs - all frozen. I'll buy some more vegetables this week, from the greengrocer that opened finally on high street. I note high street as the new cool place soon, the new west end, so you know. Some folk still wouldnt visit though and it's better for that. I really want to run. We will go tomorrow, 6 kilometers only; it will suffice.
Stuart just left the room. After Friday everything is different. It is just him and me. And the cats though. We are a family now and self sufficient. He just brought molly through to join in the study party, what a sweetie. Both of them. I feel like after friday everything changes. It's good though. Here we come to winter and a career and all that stuff we have been working for for five years. It all culminates on Friday.

I'm getting married on Friday 27th August 2010 at 3.30pm and I'm sure I've offended so many people doing this. Oh well.

3 comments:

  1. I'm excited for you, I am! Just under a year and it'll be my turn. Daunting, I don't want to know what I'll feel like when I get to so few days away. Good luck in your final days as Ms Maddock :) Enjoy Friday!

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  2. All the best for this weekend! I hope it goes well and you remember it fondly in years to come <3

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  3. Thanks to both of you it was THE BEST! :) x

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